About two years ago I started this blog.
I know! Time flies when you are wasting vast amounts of precious cleaning time making even more messes! Heaven!
Over the last two years there has been a metamorphosis of the purpose of the blog. Not unlike a caterpillar turning into a beautiful butterfly.
Okay-actually nothing like that. At all.
However, there were distinct stages:
I am so optimistic! I will blog every day and do a gazillion projects with the kids and chronicle them all with love and witticism and there will be beautiful photography and I will also get everything else in my life done on time and at the end of each year I will print out and bind copies of the blog that my family will cherish forever and ever and the extended family can read the blog and feel like they are here with us!
Wait, maybe the blog can steer us toward a greater purpose. Maybe we can aim for one charitable project a month to handmake together. We've done blankets. We've done pillowcases. We can do this! We will make dresses for girls in Africa and beanies for preemies. And surely I will blog a few times a week. And no pressure...
Well, the kids are on to me. They notice as I take furtive notes and photos and ask things like, "Is this for the blog?" It is harder to capture organic moments in lieu of "performance crafting." But I will blog at least once a week. Cross my heart and hope to...wait, what was I writing about?
A lot of people have told me I should try to get advertisers for this thing. "Look at all the blogs out there making money," they said. "You are just as good as they are." They said. So I investigated. I brainstormed a list of potential projects to have in the queue, and even made a Pinterest board of blog fodder. I researched taking the blog private and changing the name. And wrote at least one blog that month.
Seeing a trend yet?
I'm tired. Tired of coming up with cool ideas that WEREN'T from my Pinterest board and having people say, "Oh, is that from Pinterest?"
No! From my brain!
Tired of the pressure from Pinterest-esque culture that sneaks around in my subconscious saying, "Is that really a cool enough project?" Tired of forcing posts to get something on the blog. Tired of trying to make the blog "awesome".
Guilt. Did I blog? Did I remember what the girls said correctly? Did I get enough pictures? I have to do that tonight. Have to. Have to.
Strayed from the original heart of the blog. Tsk tsk tsk.
Burnout, party of one? Burnout?
I am now throwing the blog in the category of my Etsy shop.
I LOVE TO DO THIS BUT OBVIOUSLY NOT COMMERCIALLY!
Do you have something that calms you, gives you joy, makes other people happy and warms your heart? What happens to that when you HAVE TO do it? Does it shrivel up and lose its luster? I get it.
So I took a hiatus and enjoyed my family offline. Crazy, right?!
I am starting afresh, determined to return to the beginning.
"Vizzini told us to go back to the beginning!"
Like Inigo and Fezzik I am back at the beginning. Chronicling adventures with the fam. Actually a little less pressure than stage one. Certainly I now have no delusions that I will blog daily. Ha!
It will be fun and not forced. Organic, not manufactured or rushed. It will be on our family's timeline. I still make things for gifts and for friends to give as gifts but then I know it is personal. And that makes it fun.
I am happy.
I hope you are, too.
Happy New Year!